“HOBO” WITH A MOVIE DEAL
So you’re walking down the street, you come across a homeless man — dirty, smelly, scruffy — asking for change, what do you do? Ignore him? Cough up a few nickels? Laugh at him, tell him to get a job and then quote South Park? Well, if said homeless man happens to look anything like the legendary star of Blade Runner and The Hitcher, Rutger Hauer, then you give the man some damn change, maybe buy him a cup o’ Joe and a ham sandwich, and treat him to a bottle of One-Eye Pete’s Cheapjack Whiskey, lest you wind up turned into a pulpy mess of gore like the poor punks featured in Jason Eisener’s upcoming revenge flick Hobo With A Shotgun.
The inimitably bad-ass Magnet Releasing — the genre arm of baseball honcho Mark Cuban’s Magnolia Pictures — has just announced that it’s picked up the deeply disturbed and insane and awesome-looking Hobo for what I hope is a quick incoming release. Right now, no date is set, but the film is set to premiere in January at the Sundance Film Festival as part of the Midnight Program, proceeded by a screening of Jerome Sable and Eli Batalion’s equally out-to-lunch slasher/rock musical short film The Legend of Beaver Dam.
The film is a feature-length expansion of Eisener’s faux trailer, which won a following after winning a fake trailer contest tied in with Robert Rodriguez and Quentin Tarantino’s Grindhouse. (Of course, the is now that Machete has been turned into a deeply f*ckin’ awesome flick, and Hobo is getting its own expansion, when are we gonna friggin’ get a feature length Thanksgiving? And while we’re at it, a full length version of Eisner’s killer Xmas tree short Treevenge might be sweet as well.)
Now, I don’t think a plot synopsis is that much necessary for a movie that bears a moniker like Hobo With A Shotgun (it’s about a hobo. With a shotgun.) but for those who must, Hauer plays a vigilante bum with a pump-action shotgun who makes mincemeat out of innumerable nasty, and much deserving, folk. It ain’t high art people, but if you want to people getting mashed, bashed, smashed, crashed and trashed in gads of gloriously deranged, blood-geyser-spurting ways, then this film is for you! Hell the name alone makes the damn thing worth watching: say it with me Hobo With A Shotgun. Doesn’t that feel good?
I got a trailer, and a great faux-42nd Street poster, below for Hobo, and its very much definitely NSFW (that would be “not safe for work” for the acronym-challenged amongst you), so no kiddos and no people with any kind of morals or decency should watch. However, for those who are deviant, blood-thirsty, B-movie loving fucks like me, then the apeshit insanity of Hobo will provide a nice dose of crimson ambrosia.
Original Hobo With A Shotgun trailer: www.youtube.com
Legend of Beaver Dam trailer: www.dreadcentral.com