Daily Archives: November 13, 2010

WELCOME TO LASERCOLA.COM!

Yep. It's Batman with a lightsaber fighting a shark.

Greetings, Trekkies, Guildies, Losties, Browncoats, Jedi Knights, Mutants, Replicants, Zombies, Spartans, Big Daddies, Hobbit-lovers, S-Mart shoppers, Chang-Sings, Wing-Kongs, and whoever else you may align yourselves with! This is The Carter here, welcoming you to the official launch of your new favorite geek news blog, LASERCOLA.COM! Before you pop open a can of our tasty posts, be sure to check out the About page for more in-depth details on the site, and visit the Staff page to pay homage to the writers we have chained up in a dingy basement with laptops scouring the Internetz to bring you the latest trailers, casting news, reviews, etc. on your favorite geek properties. Enjoy!

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THE CARTER’S 2010 HOLIDAY GEEK GIFT GUIDE

Chances are, even if you aren’t a geek yourself, you have someone close to you that can recite Rutger Hauer’s final monologue from Blade Runner word for word, or has a vast collection of Batman underwear. The chances are even greater that, more often than not, you’ve struggled to find said loved one a suitable geek gift at Christmastime, threw your hands up in futility, and purchased them a DVD of the latest Hollywood bastardization of a beloved comic book property. Well, I’m here to help you to not be a thoughtless, unoriginal bastard this Holiday season by giving you five great, no-brainer Geek gift ideas to appease that Star Wars or X-Men nerd on your shopping list. (And to make it even easier on you, all items have an Amazon.com link and are $50 or less). Read the rest of this entry

RETRO REVIEWS WITH THE PLAID PHANTOM

Greetings, readers of LaserCola.com! I have arrived here to share with you the best and worst of films from the past. My primary task will be to shed light on the dark, murky, and sometimes downright putrid forgotten corners of movie history. In short, a good deal of the movies I’ll be reviewing are the film equivalent to that disgusting puddle or stream of brown and green (depending on which way the light hits it) garbage water that seeps from the dumpster in the back of the mall parking lot.

Don’t get me wrong here by any means folks. These are my guilty pleasures. Cheesy effects. Atrocious acting. Bad Editing. Noticeable ADR. Terrible costumes. Awful music. Mind-numbing dialogue. Films that are extremely dated. I love it all. I truly believe that a film can be so bad that it is good. I also believe that one can be so bad that it goes to good and then back to being bad again. Then you have your films which show a very obvious attempt at being awful with no shame. These are often the most fun of all. Read the rest of this entry

HOLY TERRORS #1 THE BEGINNING

Confession: I thought long and hard about how I was going to introduce my blog. Needless to say…it gave me a raging case of the writer’s block (and a headache.) I ain’t ever been a blogger before, and with the vast amounts of mouthy, opinionated writers fluttering about the blogosphere, I was hitting the proverbial wall trying to think of clever ways to make you fall deeply in lesbians with me instantly. (Yeah, a Scott Pilgrim reference. Yeah, not horror. Screw you, I love that movie.) I tried out voices, explored witticisms and generally tortured myself to levels of deep, dark, emo insecurity and still nada. And then crashing into me like a cracked-out King Kong playing tackle football was an idea, and of course it was one of the easiest, simplest and most obvious ideas. Read the rest of this entry

W.O.W. NON-GAMER HOLIDAY GIFT GUIDE

The holidays are coming up and you’re probably wondering what to get your favorite gamer. Being the materialistic fangirl that I am, I spend a lot of time looking at World of Warcraft schlock and paraphernalia. Here are a couple of standard gift ideas, as well as some more unique options, to show your uber l33t loved one that you support their passion 😉

I’m going to assume, since Cataclysm comes out light years before the holidays (in terms of how long a gamer can usually stand to wait on an expansion), that your gamer will already have this next edition to the game. However, if they don’t, this is where you’d want to start with them. Make sure that they also have the other two expansions leading up to Cat before splurging on the most recent one. If you know they’re raiding Lich King / ICC, then you’re all set. If they keep talking about Azeroth and the difficulties of trying to find other level 60s to play with, then you might be in for more of an investment than you were thinking. Read the rest of this entry

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